"Are You Ready?"

As the due date gets closer and closer (July 26 by mathematical calculations), I find more and more people keep asking us the same inevitable question; "Are you ready?". Although the words of the question stays the same, the context of which it is asked and by whom it is asked makes the world of difference.

The first category of people I call the Dreamers. These are the really giddy people who ask the question  with pure excitment that sound like they are more excited to meet our baby boy than we are. For the most part these are the people who do not have kids, but love babies and secretly think about stealing really cute babies when they see them in the supermarket.  The Dreamers have never actually had babies themselves, but have spent no more than 2 hours with them and think they are nothing more than soft, smiley, sweet smelling balls of love and cuteness. The excitement in the way they ask the question portrays a sense of jealousy in their voice, as they imagine a day when they will be expecting a little one of their own.

The next group of questioners, the Skeptics, ask the same question, but as they ask it the tone in their voice makes it come across more like, "Are you really ready?...I mean....really?" The Skeptics are the people with who just the very thought of being responsible for another life freaks them out.  They can in no way imagine why anyone at the age of 25 would want to have a kid that would subsequently take up all of their time. They quickly put themselves in our shoes and immediately jump right back out of them. They have so many other worries and obligations in their life right now, they briefly consider never doing anything again that would even lead to the chance to reproduce. I still have not figured out if the Skeptics respect us for starting a family or feel sorry for us.

My favorite cluster of questioners are the Realist. I have a standard rule that every Realist is a parent. You can tell they are parents by not only the tone they use to ask the question,  but also their body language as they ask it.  As they cock their head to the side, raise an eyebrow, juggle a kid on one hip and a pack-n-play on the other, a sarcastic smirk comes across their face with a small laugh sneaking out as they ask, "Are you ready?.  My favorite thing about the Realist is that they ask the question while fully knowing the answer. They have enough experience to know that there is no way you can possibly be ready for the hurricane of life that is descending upon your marriage.  Every time a Realist ask me this question, I feel like they are secretly praying for my sanity.

So to answer the question, Yes I am ready. I am ready for the hurricane (stop shaking your heads Realist). When I say I am ready, I mean that I am prepare to be unprepared. I fully accept the fact that no matter how many books I read, advice I get, or how many runs to Babies R Us we partake in, there is no way to ever be prepared. I fully expect to be physically, mentally, and emotionally strained for the rest of my life. This I am all willing to sacrifice for the impending adventure.  I feel like this is best described in the book, Becoming a Dad by Stephen James and David Thomas:


           "Nothing to date has expressly prepared you for parenting...This is a season that God has set aside for you to grow in wisdom and influence. It is your responsibility and opportunity to turn toward the moment with your whole heart, as best you are able. Bring all your fear, joy, vision, doubt, hope dreams, and longings into focus and take the leap" pg 42 (Not APA format, sorry Prof McGinty)